Family reunion ends in disaster

Family reunion ends in disaster

There is this time-honoured axiom that says where one has announced goodnight, one does not return to say good evening. This proverb essentially teaches the virtue of firmness. It conveys the message that when you decide that you are through with something or a relationship because of its negative impact on you, you should stand by your decision and refuse to go back to your vomit no matter what. This adage in relation to marital relationships tends to foreclose or forbid reconciliation. But reconciliation between married couples who separated when the relationship became sour is good so long as no one is hurt in the process. However, some reconciliations between couples who were married but became estranged have ended in disaster, making that proverb justifiable. Such reunions were not done with wisdom, and that caused some of the parties involved to regret going back on their earlier decisions to go their separate ways.

A woman whose action proved the aphorism right is currently living by the grace of a public spirited Non-Governmental Organisation (NGO). The woman who is based in Jos is incidentally a product of the Yoruba community where the maxim is held sacrosanct, and was married to a businessman of the same tribe who turned out to be a womanizer. They had two kids but the woman was not happy with the woman-wrapper lifestyle of her man, which led to quarrels between them from time to time. Eventually, the woman decided to separate from her spouse as she could no longer tolerate his extra-marital affairs. She moved out of her matrimonial home with her kids as hypertension beckoned to her. She didn’t earn much from her job, but she managed to take care of her kids who are both receiving primary education.

But about two years after the separation, the man came begging her to return to him. He claimed he had changed and wanted to be with her and their kids. He showered her with gifts to placate her for all his wrongdoings, promising to make it up to her by being the good and faithful husband she had wanted him to be. The woman thought about her children and decided to return to their father so that they would live together as one big happy family. But unknown to this woman, her man had contracted the dreaded HIV/AIDS disease. While they both basked in the euphoria of their reunion, the woman became pregnant and gave birth to a baby girl who was HIV positive. The woman and her husband were tested and discovered to be HIV positive. That was when the woman realized the trouble she had gotten herself into by returning to her disgorgement. They were both healthy before she parted ways with him, and their first two kids are free of the killer disease. The baby was fragile and always sick, prompting her to be in and out of hospital constantly. And when she was about a year old, she bid the family goodnight… forever.

Few months after the death of the baby, the woman’s husband took ill and began to emaciate, and before long, he too tendered goodnight to his family. The woman began to run from pillar to post, seeking a way out of her predicament to avoid being the next victim. She wanted to be alive to take care of her remaining kids. She went from hospitals to spiritual homes in pursuit of solution, more so that her meager salary could not afford her the necessary drugs. As God would have it, she eventually ran into an NGO that gives anti-retroviral drugs to HIV/AIDS patients free of charge. She was fortunate to be among those selected for the free dispensing of the drugs. She is presently on the drugs and living a normal life, working to care for herself and her children. But she is full of regrets over her decision to be reconciled to a man she knew was a chronic womanizer without considering the health implications of his (mis)adventure.